If you have ever been on a plane, you have been subjected to the flight attendants’ spiel about what to do if the cabin loses pressure. They explain that oxygen masks will fall from the ceiling and show you how to put them on. Every time, they remind you that if you are travelling with a child or someone else in need of assistance, you must be sure to put your mask on before you try to help anyone else. The implication is clear. If you don’t take care of yourself, then you won’t be able to care for anyone else. You’ll be lying unconscious in the aisle. The lesson of the oxygen mask exposes the flawed thinking many people have about what it means to serve and love others. For some reason, people think that taking care of yourself means being selfish. Not taking care of yourself actually puts you in the powerless position of trying to get other people to meet your needs without being able to offer anything in return. This is a setup for an unhealthy, selfish relationship.
Danny Silk, Keep Your Love On